Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Randomize
