I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Panties = found
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
