I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Randomize
