if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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