He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Randomize
