Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
