Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
