Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
