i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
