no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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