You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
