brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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