i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
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