I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
