How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
