Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
