Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
that's an acceptable place to lick
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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