Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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