He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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