Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
40s are totally the cure
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
