This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
