is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
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