Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
