why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Randomize
