That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
My pussy is not your playground.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
