But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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