He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
