grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
