Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
