Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Randomize
