I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
