That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
