You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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