I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize