toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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