Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
