I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
