would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
