By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
