Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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