I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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