your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
Randomize
