Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
