In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
