VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
