how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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