I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
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