guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
