let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
Randomize
