He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
